Hiney Duck Hiss

have you ever played that one game where you read something and logically it doesnt make any sense but its sounds like a common phrase or whatever when you listen to it? haha sorry if that made no sense, but yea just referring to the title, sound it out ;]

anywhooz, this weekend i cleaned out the garage with my mom (and by that i mean we compact the piles of useless shit against the wall) so we could fit both our cars in, and in the process came across a goldmine. in all seriousness, i was so stoked and still have not calmed down about it. how about i dont tell you just yet...i'll just show you...











yes that is me with the duckhunt gun in the first pic up there! =D AHHHA! folllowed by the best system to ever hit my life with all the old games! thennn my first toy car that i got for xmas when i was about 4 or 5...no i didnt get the barbie dreamhouse, nailpolish, or an easybake oven...i got a toy car, and i loved it =]. followed by an old school sewing machine that works better than most of the new ones ive used. i live for making my own shit which includes but is not limited to shirts, pants (just alterations tho...the fuck i look like), pillows, pillow cases, blankets, quilts, & decorating just about everything. and the last item would be a telescope. a hella old one at that, like made in the 60's. nigga im bout to get on some a-walk-to-remember type shit! <3

BUT since you took the time to read this, i would also ask that you please take some time to pray for my friend Brenda. shes goin through hard times and she needs all the help she can get. thanks.

BUT (p.2)
"i think i deserve some love on your blog... but thats just what i think hahaha


hope your doing amazingly

F E N G"
& there you go niggs. haha
vote for quest crew on mtv bitches
and i will now enjoy watching some stars ^_^

Five Grand

hola, today was yet again another success. =] i woke up helllllla fucking early, but its ok. cant be mad about waking up next to uhhhh certain someone ;] muahah. neways....my mother and i set out on a mission today and i couldnt be any happier. walking&talking&bitching&shit but what did i finally end up with?! my first car muthafucka!!! freal! are you excited right now? bkus if not, you should be. its a black jetta. yea i know "girly car" (Rance!) but i care not. i will love that thing till i have no more love left haha! thennnn i went to a viewing. i know thats a sad thing and yes i did drop a few tears, but like i said before, its a reminder to appreciate everything i have and it keeps my head on straight. *RestInPeace* next in this day of wonderful madness, i went to groove* dance class, (groovedanceclass.com or myspace.com/groovedanceclass gotta add the plug nawwmsayin?!) and learned a piece from the black man himself, darrell riviera. i liked it, and like everyone else within this community i support them and am VERY inspired by all the amazing things they come up with. THEN if that wasnt enough, right after class i had joint rehearsal with HiFi and FORM vegas where we learned a piece from pat cruz. if you dont know about him, then go to youtube and search away. hes dope, and def fried the fuck outta everyones brain tonight tryna learn his piece and get down his style. fuckinshitss. aha. andd lastly after rehearsal i went to eat robertoes with some of my favorite people followed by us smashing on some rockband at the casa of my bestnigguhh, Rance/Aaron. i would have to say that today was pretty fuckin legit. soo pleased and now i just want a warm shower and my bed to jump into =]

ohh and the title would be referring to the price of the car. not bad braddduhh!

Have Mercy On The Soul

Death is something we will never get used to. when you hear of loved ones passing away, youre never prepared and it seems like theres nothing left for you to do but cry. today i met with some friends and went to the house of a girl we all know whose mother just died. although i was not her closest friend and i didnt know her mom, it still hurts to hold someone in your arms and watch them breakdown over such a huge loss. its a painful experience that hurts not only the family, but an entire community of people. It just reminds me that tomorrow is never promised and neither are the people i care about so i need to appreciate them everyday while theyre still here because you never know. RestInPeace.

on a much much lighter note, regardless of todays event, i did have a good day. i love spending quality time with "special" people haha. theres nothing like straight chillin with someone else, not doing anything important, and just enjoying each others company. talking about anything and everything, not talking at all, making each other laugh, looking at each other, making fun of each other, watching a movie, sharing some cereal, singing, dancing, boxing (with gloves! =D)....the list goes on forever. its like you dont have to force it, theres nothing to work on, and nothing needs to be fixed because it just makes sense. kinda like those massive ass 5000+ piece puzzles. you match the pieces with things that you think might work, you try to force pieces to fit together when you know damn well its not meant to be, and you really just feel frustrated and want to quit. BUT when you do find the right pieces.....the puzzle comes together, and you finally see that you wouldnt have it any other way. its so clear that you kinda wonder why you couldnt see it in the first place. i guess its all just a learning expierience and we have to go through hell first because without all that, we would never be able to fully appreciate what we end up with...

and also...
1. someone came up to me today and asked me if i was in formality. -___- hahahahha if you are a dancer you can see the humor in this. of course i said no.....because if you dont know, thats an all male dance team.....which now that i think about it, if you know me and how i am, i could see why he'd ask that hahahah
2. i heart joey diamond. too bad hes gay. shucks. hahaha

the end!

The Waiting Game

Fein'n for this feeling of falling
blame the clutch or gas, either way stuck stalling
feeble heart couldn't rock the rewind
before realizing she got robbed blind
history left the roots straight smashed and twisted
if you hadn't looked as hard, its promised you would've missed it
the green thumb to stunt the growth of thorns upon this rose
opening doors that take twice as much effort to close
posted with a foundation as firm as a porcelain shell
take it as fake or give faith, there's no way to tell
skipping beats & backward thinking
guard down, doubt shrinking
set aside the feelings, whether into it or opposite, its all the same
we just have to wait for the present to pass as we play the waiting game.

Sick With It

no but freal tho. i really am sick with a runny nose (yuck), and cough. and if i take deep breaths it sounds like im wheezing n shit. im dying! haha jk. but it has been this way since november. -___- and i know it doesnt help that i continue to go out n kick it...or go to the mountains to play in the snow, but fucks it. i do whut i wawnt! id really like to be better in time for my birthday tho, which just so happens to be in less than a month on FEB 4. so yuh know, presents are always welcome. even in the form of a alcoholic beverage =D ohhhh but something you should get me is this.....

tell me that is not sick?! little foxdog?! holler!....speaking of animals, i went to look for my turtle (King Koopa [like mario bros.]) today; he was all in his shell n even tho i poked him he wouldnt come out, and i thought he was dead!!! D= but thank God for hibernation, as i soon found out thats what he was up too. hmmmm, what else can i tell you readers out there......oh yea! i got my grades for last semster and i passed all my classes! fuckin sweet bro! 2 A's, 1 B-, and a C. vewwy pweased. wellll uhhh yea. i dont have anything worthwhile to say. and this has prob been the biggest waste of your life thus far. too bads so sads. well look forward to poems on my shit tho. im going to try and write one at the end of every month. not about anything specific, just whatever comes to mind. mmmhmmm that about ends it for now, have a good night weenies! =]

012707

no longer do i keep you in my mind
but on occasion you drop from time to time
never thoughts of how you were mine
just well wishes that all is fine
while speculations might say i cocked the nine
ive moved on while that sits behind...
it would be nice to hear that you were doing good
but you sit in silence as you should
never was our intent to be apart
but its necessary for us to regain a heart
empty and bitter from what had been
now fresh and ready with a high held chin
no plans nor directions for what is yet to be
but it is certain that i will live and i will do it happily

Wrappin It Up

have you ever had one of those days that at the end of it all you couldnt be more pleased with how it went? like you just feel like saying "fuck today was sufficient" haha or maybe in different words. but anyway, today was one of those days for me. i was with kickback chill ass heads, there was no drama, i threw snowballs up in the mountains like there was no tomorrow, had a little cook out, and ended it all with a hot ass bath becuase it was pretty damn cold. now the only thing i could ask for is some hot cocoa, a blanket, some snacks, and a movie to watch. and ya know, maybe even toss in a partner to enjoy it with ;] hahah just sayin.


sooo twothousandhate is drawing to an end. and thank goodness for that bkus for me, this year was a bitch! mass amounts of growth have been made on my part though, and for that i am thankful. for some reason i am extremely excited for 09. ive never really been big on new years and a new start but with all thats happened these past few months little or big, i truly believe there is no where to go but up from here. some things that im looking forward to are: further discovering myself, dancing with HiFi LV/*groove/any stage near you, appreciating and enjoying friendships, meeting new people, testing career ideas, and living everyday like its my last.

ive never been the type to regret anything i do because i know any event that happens is a necessary experience in my growth as an individual; but ive decided that from 09 till infinity there is no more room for hate and anger, no time to regret, no tolerance for pain inflicted by others, no more unappreciated efforts within relationships, (friends and lovers included)(each part sold separately.hah) and no more wasting of my energy in things that bottom line dont make me happy. this next year is going to be about good vibes, positive people, staying happy, and being there for the ones i love............and oh yes, there will be money=D and lots of it!!!

everyone have a safe and happy new year, esp. for my fellow vegas heads because we all know just how insane it can get in this town =] holler for 2009 weenies!

What Would You Do

if you knew that the next full room of people that you walked into would have twice as many eyes looking at you, and behind those eyes everyone was assuming the same exact thing?
or if you knew your life would never be the same based off things you have no control over?
or maybe even if you became paranoid to turn the next corner in fear of what could be waiting for you?....

life isnt always as forgiving as we wish it was. as much as we wish we were in complete control, we arent. things happen for a reason and its always going to lead you into the next phase. we are given choices on the daily but whatever we decide will ALWAYS be right because its made to lead us to our ultimate fate. even if we get cut deep, we have to keep pushing for tomorrow; when its time, the bleeding will eventually stop and the wounds will heal. so how do you deal with the pain that life throws you?....

you walk into that room with a humble heart and an understanding that you cant help what others think. keep your head up no matter how hard it is to deal.
you trust that life, fate, and God most of all, will comfort you and guide you through tough times. there is nothing negative about change, because change is growth.
you wake up and realize that there will always be a surprise around the corner and instead of being scared and fighting it, embrace it and never forget the lesson you were meant to learn.


"God grant me the serenity
to accept the things i cannot change;
the courage to change the things i can;
and the wisdom to know the difference."

The Man Of My Dreams

is someone i have not met yet. hah but i can sure as hell tell you what i would like for him to be like...

first of all, if i have just met homeboy and already he's trying to refer to me as "baby, mami, sweetheart, etc." i will immediately be disappointed. you automatically fail in the first impression category, so if you know whats best for you, dont even go there with me. or with any girl for that matter...

moving along... i dont need a super smart straight A's havin dude, just someone who knows whats up with more in depth conversation. if you dont know how to make our conversation go beyond cars, weed, shoes, clothes, parties, or anything else hype related i WILL mark you down as a friend and that is where you will remain until i see more. that shits cool n all, and i dont mind hearing about your hobbies and interests, but what i really want to know is where your mind set is at. where are you trying to take your life, what moves are you planning to make, what is your take on life in general. this guy MUST be able to get on that level, and hopefully surpass mine. freal (for + real. fyi.) goals, striving for more, and ambition is def part of the perfect package...

now for the question that so many people think of the most, "do looks matter?" OBVIOUSLY im not going to get down with no quasi motto lookin foo, but i can honestly say no, they do not matter. and now you say in your head "yea right" hah im not kidding though, and i have proof. the last person i was serious with was in no way cute or attractive to me whatsoever! no lie! I would even tell him that! hahah but the thing that gets me is the personality. if you come correct and on point, its all down hill for me. i will be so beyond dunnzo over you. hah this personality usually includes ill conversation, witty jokes for days, and true to heart values. i dont need you to drive me around in your car, i have two legs and a bus pass. i dont need you to pay for everything, i had my own back before you were ever around. but what i do need is someone that knows how to keep it cool with me and just stay down. thats it.

but please dont take this as an open invitation all you blog lurkers out there hah. this is just what i think the ideal guy should be like. i dont plan on meeting him and i am in no way trying to. this kind of thing cant be forced or pressed for time, when its meant to happen it will. all i know is, when i do meet him i'll know its the real deal; this man wont try to run game and impress me, because he was already dope.

Cookies Of Fortune

So today was pretty much filled with laundry, TV, and cold toes. The heater can be on blast in my house but my feet never fail to freeze! And can i just give it up to Vegas for getting some snow up in this bitch?! but anyways, after eating Thai food with this one Jedi Knight i know i received a fortune cookie that reads as follows:

"A romantic mystery will soon add interest to your life."

awww isnt that sweet? -__- haha but thanks to that sliver of paper, i have been inspired to write a little about relationships. so if you care to read, then boys take notes and girls peep game...

One part of a relationship that is retardedly important is the foundation. you cannot come straight out the gate on shaky ground. expectations should be made clear and the height at which each individual holds their standards should never be lowered, not even for a moment. once the bars are lowered the relationship loses its integrity and its a struggle to hold on because unacceptable things were allowed to slide. if something is allowed once, it will more than likely be allowed to happen again.

Honesty is a necessity. the truth doesnt hurt, it kills, but it is better to keep it real than to lie to someone you care for. this also includes telling the whole story and not leaving out details to cover your ass. there is no such thing as a half truth, that is what normal people call lying. if you messed up, its best to just own up to your actions and hope for the best.

TRUST. if this is not thee biggest killer to most, if not all relationships then i dont know what is. at the beginning of a relationship everyones all excited, the butterflies are still running a mock, trumpets are playing and then....someone slips up. whatever stupid reason it is, there is no more trust and shits hitting the fan left and right. now at this point you can either call it quits, or you can forgive them and move on. if you should choose to move on, then that means you WILL NOT hold the past against them and they regain your trust. so stick to your word dammit! stop accusing each other of things that you think might be happening, dont make that "you cant party without me" rule, and dont even think about searching through text messages. just accept that not everyone is perfect and mistakes will happen. without trust you cannot move on and there will be no growth.

yup, thats pretty much all i have to offer for now. nothing you didnt already know, just some thoughts. and on a much lighter note, if you have not seen this video already, enjoy it. =]